Initially I had little or no interest in this film but after hearing good things about it from a lot of sources I decided to check it out. Unfortunately for me this was not a new classic of horror that some people hail it as, it's a disjointed mess that's light on scares, originality, and fun. House of 1000 Corpses somehow manages even to mess up when it comes to plot structure, something even the lowest of horror movies can usually pull off.<br /><br />It does have a few redeeming elements; the carnival sideshow style of horror is an interesting motif for the film, Sid Haig's character is cool and underused unfortunately, and occasionally Zombie manages to unnerve by using quick jumps to snuff like 16mm footage, a technique that would have been better served if the director was able to exercise more restraint, especially in the early film. The film also contains a rather clever plot misdirection about mid way through, a subplot about cops and one of the victim's father that makes you think the plot is going to evolve one way, but then completely changes direction you. I have to give credit to Zombie for fooling and surprising me.<br /><br />The film's real problem is in the comparison it invites with its betters, this film basically is "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre", and it doesn't hold up well to the seminal 1974 classic. A movie that was made for approximately $140,000, that still manages to be way more effective then House. Maybe if you stripped Zombie of his 7 million dollar budget he would have been able to show his true film-making chops and been able to pull off the low budget fun and carnage he so desperately tries to achieve with this film; more likely this film would have been stripped of it's disguise of high production values and clever sets, and be revealed to everyone as the naked unfocused mess that it is. Even with its budget, the gore is nothing; there is nothing shocking or creative or fun. Maybe the unrated version is better, but since it's completely unavailable I have no way of knowing. As the R rated version stands it fails as a gross out flick and then later goes on to fail even completely at the loftier goal of actually being scary. When I first watched TCM I really was unnerved by it, and I found myself thinking about for weeks after. I watched House of 1000 Corpses today, and nothing has stayed with me; what little effect it had on me was gone the second I stopped watching it. Hell, I might even be fooled into renting this again years from now when I completely forget about it.<br /><br />"So what", you might say, "it's not scary, not all movies of this variety have to be scary, look at Evil Dead 2". Well the problem is it's not really fun either. The teen victims are completely indistinguishable, which in fairness is pretty common complaint for this genre, and the killers, who the film is obviously in love with, are just too gaudy and derivative of slasher stereotypes. The one that had the ability to stand out from the crowd, Sid Haig's Captain Spaulding, disappears for most of the movie. So for most the film you are left with a plot, that much like victims, runs but never gets anywhere. It almost seems like a masturbation reel for serial killers. I get what he was going for, I've seen the dinner scene from Texas Chainsaw Massacre (there is that comparison again, but I can't help if the shoe fits), Zombie just doesn't achieve the disquieting creepy effect that film had. Towards the end the plot just spirals out of control into what I think was a failed attempt at surrealism, personally I was just glad it was going somewhere. After what is a close approximation of the last teen going through a house of horrors, the films ends on a truly predictably note that once again feels ripped from TCM.<br /><br />Overall this movie just kinda sucks plain and simple. I get that it's a homage, but it's just not a particularly effective one. Zombie might eventually be able to develop his directing into something interesting but first he has to clear the hurdle from music video style and shock to film atmosphere and substance. I will end by saying one more positive thing about the film; it's not the 2003 remake of Texas Chainsaw Massacre.