If ever there were a film more mystifyingly pointless than this £1 shop favorite, it's hard to imagine – and even harder to tell exactly what possible audience it was made for. On paper it sounds uninspired but reasonable enough, with Caine's old school armed robber planning to steal paper used for banknotes with inside information from James Fox's toff and electronic help from Kenneth Colley's terminally ill security guard. Only that's only half the story - much of the plot is taken up by a bullied chubby schoolboy who stumbles across the bloody aftermath of one of Caine's botched armoured car jobs but can't get anyone to believe him. Amazingly the botched robbery is never reported to the police, so they just go on not believing him throughout the film while he's cruelly bullied by the vicious, er, school choirboys, one of who is nearly four foot tall. Producer-director Reeve seems to think the film's suspense lies on whether he'll still be able to sing in the choir competition. <br /><br />It's all played out almost like the kind of movie that Tim Nice But Dim would make if he ever became a producer, throwing loads of money at Michael Caine and getting a few down on their luck character actors down to the family estate for the weekend. Ponies, fancy dress parties, public schools with headmasters in tennis attire, suggestive dialogue about lacrosse - even in the 50s this would have seemed a somewhat outdated view of Britain, but in a late-90s crime thriller it's just pitiful. Just to add to the amateurishness, some of the parts are played by real teachers, vergers or cops (no prizes for. Guessing wh. ich onesfromtheir. Awkward line. Delivery), not to mention the director's daughters. As if that weren't home movie enough, it's the kind of film where even the ponies get credited and where characters have picnics in abandoned factories to explain the backstory at great length. TV crime reconstructions have more panache than this flattened relic, and to make matters even worse, the final double-double cross is almost Robbie Moffat bad, and that's not a claim I make lightly. No surprise that this skipped theatres and went straight to ultra-cheap DVD, but you'll still find yourself wondering how and why it ever got made in the first place.