"Cowboy Bebop" is, according to some, one of the best anime ever. It's a "classic" and a "required viewing" for any anime fan. It's "the best" because it has "multiple-layered storytelling", a "freely-flowing story", and so on.

I'm calling it as it is. Cowboy Bebop is the most over-stretched, plodding, boring, (insert curse word which begins with "c" and ends with "p" here + "-py") biggest piece of (insert curse word which begins with "s" and ends with "t" here) anime I have ever seen.

My gripes are as following: 1. The story is original, yes. But, Shinichiro Watanabe aimed too high with it, and it came out a piece of (insert curse word which begins with "c" and ends with "p" here). All episodes are over-stretched and full of various story lines to the point that they're, actually, incredibly boring and utterly dull.

2. The characters are (insert curse word which begins with "f" and ends with "k" here) annoying. Spike comes off as a big idiot who is only capable of sleeping and eating, his fighting abilities appear forced so that Mr. Watanabe wouldn't be stuck with the dumbest lead character since that (insert following curse word: combine the one which begins with "s" and ends with "t" + the British slang one which is "a" + "r" + "s" + "e") from DNA2. That Ed person is even more annoying: I couldn't tell until the movie if the character was male or female. Pretty much every character annoyed me to a certain extent, the only exception being Jet.

Sidenote: isn't it quite odd that no character has a Japanese name?

3. The story moves along at the exact pace of a wounded snail trying to escape from under a tire in slow-motion. In short: it's too (insert curse word which begins with "f" and ends with "k" + "-ing" here) slow! If you're a webcomic fan, think MegaTokyo, and you get the picture (if you're not a webcomic fan, think about the old modem connections in the 1990s. Those were really really slow) Not only that, but there are too many story lines which intersect at once, again, slowing down the show horribly and making it look both haphazard, plodding and directionless.

The only thing I liked about the series is its soundtrack by Yoko Kanno (and sometimes Yoko Kanno's band "The Seatbelts"). No, really, you should just throw away your DVDs and settle for the soundtrack CDs. This is the only thing that matters. It reminds me strongly of the old "Blues Brothers" movies. Which in essence is good, but it's better that it dosen't consist of just funk/blues stuff. It's also got electronic and trip-hop things.

In conclusion: Cowboy Bebop is just about as entertaining as staring a sack of (insert curse word which begins with "s" and ends with "t" here) while paint dries in the background.

I'm still amazed how this absolutely horrible thing gets so many accolades from people.