Set amidst the picturesque cityscape of Australia, 'Salaam Namaste' is the story of two displaced Indian young people (Saif Ali Khan and Preity Zinta) who meet and suddenly decide to live together. If that premise seems like I am leaving something out, rest assured that is not the case. In typical Bollywood fashion, the two leads detest each other initially only to end up together. But instead of having them do so at the end of the film, the writers chose to have them profess their love and live together after only a couple of days of having known one another. How could that possibly go wrong? This is part of the underlying problem with the film. In trying to avoid many of the conventional Bollywood clichés, the film-makers instead set up over the top situations for the leads that lack any logic or sense. 'Salaam Namaste' also seems to try too hard to have a little bit of everything. It is filled with slapstick comedy and romance that is quickly interrupted with deep rooted conversations about abortion and the definition of life when Preity turns up pregnant. As one can imagine, this feels very awkward and out of place considering everything that surrounds it. The movie only gets increasingly nonsensical as the story unfolds. Without giving too much away for those that want to waste time watching this, there are situations that develop that feel as though there were lifted right out of a Three's Company episode with Jack Tripper being put in compromising situations that are then misunderstood. The finale of the film features a birthing scene that looks as though it could have been a Three Stooges short as Abhishek Bachchan plays the clueless obstetrician who apparently gets anxiety attacks while doing his job!
This leads to the film's other flaw; there is an unusual number of comedic relief characters. Not withstanding the two-dimensional best friend characters, there are several other unfunny characters ranging from the Indian landlord who thinks he's Crocodile Dundee to the radio station manager who giggles hysterically every time he speaks. While a certain amount of levity is standard in even the most dramatic of Bollywood films, 'Salaam Namaste' simply goes overboard with supporting actors that overact every time they are on screen. In fact, this film is riddled with the most shallow and superficial characters of any film I have ever seen. Saif Ali Khan and Preity Zinta are also victims of the overacting bug. Despite the writers setting up long drawn out examples of how different their characters are (she's a studious college student/ radio host and he's a carefree chef), both leads approach their roles in the same manner. They are constantly yelling at each other while trying too hard to appear as though there is love between them. Movies like this work better when one lead plays the "straight character" that keeps the situations in the movie grounded in some semblance of reality. Not so here, as both leads ham it up as much as possible only to interject moments of awkward seriousness when scenes call for it.
Visually, 'Salaam Namaste' is a stunning gem. The montage sequences that set up the back-stories of each of the characters are actually funny and well constructed. The dance numbers are nothing exceptional but some are quite memorable aesthetically. Speaking of which, this film boasts quite possibly the most absurd musical sequence ever as an 8 month pregnant Preity is seen dancing and singing! It is one of the more ridiculous moments in a film that already feels forced and subsequently further kills any type of credibility that it sorely needs. It's clear from the outtakes during the closing credits that the cast and crew obviously had a lot of fun making this film but it never quite translates well on screen. In closing, this is a very poorly constructed film that probably generated audience interest primarily because of the controversial theme of the two leads living together and becoming pregnant before marriage. For much better examples of "boy meets girl" Bollywood films, I would recommend 'Hum Tum' and 'Jab We Met'.