Synopsis: Clare (Jackey Hall) and Julie (Andrea Ownbey), the campus snobs of Arkham University, are attempting to seek their own brand of revenge on goth girl Sarah (Ciara Richards) and her friend Allison (Adrianna Eder). When the campus is overrun by zombies, the snobs see a good opportunity to get back at their black-clad enemies. Unfortunately, things may not go as smoothly as Clare & Julie want and they might be the zombies' prey instead. . .
Review: This is about as bad as a zombie flick can get these days. Other than the attractive females that like to take their clothes off, there isn't a single positive element to this stinkfest. It's not funny, it's not scary, it's just horrible. The story, if there is one, makes little sense at all. The script (if there actually was one and it wasn't just a bunch of idiots running around speaking in 90s clichés) is offensively bad, and it's only worsened by sincerely THE worst acting I've ever seen in my life (no exaggeration). I mean, these people make walking look difficult. They make Keanu Reeves look like Laurence Olivier. As the film progresses to the actual 'zombie invasion' (which, strangely, wasn't the first ten minutes when zombies were wandering all over campus), it only gets worse and worse. The direction during 'action' (for lack of a better word) scenes is almost unwatchable. Hell, even during the still shots, the camera-work is pathetic. By the end, it's a grueling experience to get through and I, with my very high tolerance for total crap, barely made it through. This is, without a doubt, one of the worst films I have ever seen and will probably ever see. Avoid at all costs.
Obligatory Zombie Elements:
Cause of Outbreak: The spread of blood of a zombie brought back to the states by some idiot professor. . . or something.
Zombie Characteristics: They're mostly slow, shambling, etc., except for the occasional one with superhuman strength and kung fu abilities.
Zombie Effects: Apparently powdered sugar and ketchup = Zombie faces. Not even remotely terrifying or realistic.
Violence/Gore: There may be quite a bit of zombie violence, but the gore is just ridiculously bad and some of the worst I've ever seen. If strawberry syrup and Fruit Roll-Ups are disgusting gore to you, then this is the film for you.
Sex/Nudity: The film spends the first ten or so minutes acting like softcore porn, but that ends abruptly and the rest of the film is spent mostly clothed.
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Final Verdict: 1/10. Truly, truly painful.
Recommended? I would not wish this curse upon anyone.
-AP3-