The first 25 minutes of this movie are a barrage of musical numbers meant to launch you into the narrative and to sum up the hoofers life in vaudeville. There's only one narrative development resentfully included (the kids go to catholic school), but the daring musical gambit is a flop – It just keeps the movie shallow for way too long.<br /><br />There are musicals where people breaking into song don't look awful. The Donahues preoccupations did not become my preoccupations. Their trivial story did not draw an ounce of interest from me. The musical numbers are an odd mix of triviality presented with boundless energy. All of them clown their way through the 'performances' in an effort to be funny or likable. Does it really need to be said again that having to watch people mugging and clowning just sucks? <br /><br />The movie is notable as a casting trainwreck. Audiences who want to see Johnny Ray, Marilyn Monroe, Ethel Merman, Donald O'Connor, and Dan Dailey are distinctly different. All of them give it their all, believing that ten thousand volts of personality will put this flimsy idea over, but they're wrong. Despite Merman and Dailey frantically working to persuade you they have charm, they're both just strident. The 3 male leads are all annoying. Daily is tepid and unlikable. Ray is a wussbag. O'Connor is a smidge less annoying than usual. And Merman? Ugh! What is the appeal of a homely guttersnipe whose singing voice sounds like a heel dragged across a floor?