What malarkey. If you find yourself faced with the option of watching Island of Blood or kicking a stool out from under yourself with a rope around your neck, go for the stool.

A bunch of doofuses who can't act in real life get together on an island to make a stupid film that is so atrociously fake-acted that it hurts to watch. Stupid, stupid, stupid film. Everyone starts getting bumped off in mildly gory ways that refer to the catchy punk song "Face to Face" which is always playing when someone gets knocked off.

Here's every kill in the film so you don't have to see it: gal at the pool gets blasted in the head with a shotgun at close range, which decapitates her and causes her cranium to sink to the bottom of the pool; guy boils to death in the pool and then later on the cook makes boiled lobster for dinner, which causes everyone to leave the dinner table in disgust (I take issue with this because it's lobster...who the hell turns down lobster for crissakes?! irregardless!); a chick of African persuasion takes a shower and has a jug of battery acid tossed on her causing a stupid melting scene; guy stabbed from underneath a bed while he's having sex (with a girl); uh, I can't think of the rest of the kills.

Here's the end of the movie: The antisocial punk member of the cast gets tricked into giving a confession and gets killed by the final girl. Then the film's producer is exposed as the culprit and gets shot by the final girl. He was in it to make "death movies" for a pile of cash. There, now ya don't hafta see it. You can thank me later. Watch the far superior rock music-infused crapfest Blood Tracks instead.